Folding the Stupid Socks

It all started innocently enough.  I was tired of socks that slip down.  I wear Birkenstock sandals almost constantly, because I have had arch and many other foot problems and the podiatrist told me I should wear them all of the time.  But I prefer wearing them with socks.  Socks that don't slip down. Socks that don't have the toe flapping out in front of the sandal.

So, feeling a bit righteous, I ordered a pair of black organic socks.  I followed the sizing guidelines, and this pair fit OK, but it was just a tad too small.  But, YAY, it didn't slip down.  So, I decided to order some more pairs of the same brand of socks.  It was easy to tell the smaller socks from the larger ones, so folding them after doing the laundry wasn't too bad.  Until some of them seemed to shrink a bit more than the others in the washer and dryer.

But, of course, now that I had decided that these socks worked, I was even more annoyed at the other socks that I had that kept slipping down.  But you can't really throw out socks that are still usable, just because they are annoying.  So, I kept wearing them.  Until the great garage sale and subsequent clothing donations.  Aha!  A valid way to get rid of usable socks - donate them to people who need them.  People who wear sneakers shouldn't have the slipping down problem. Most people seem to wear closed-in shoes and should appreciate usable socks.

Then, because I don't do laundry that often, I needed more black socks.  So I bought another batch of black organic socks, just like the larger ones I had gotten before.  Exactly like them.  Well, not so much.  If you wear a lot of black clothing items, you know that black isn't always the same color.  One black may be a bit grayer than the other black.

So now folding socks after doing the laundry has become much more complicated.  I could just ignore the various sizings and shadings of the very similar black socks.  But, I have to fold socks near outdoor light, so that I can pick out the pair of navy socks that I sometimes also wear.  Wearing one navy sock and one black sock is definitely noticeable, once you are out in sunlight.  But, in natural light the difference between blacks also becomes apparent.

So now, since I am a bit OCD about socks, I spend way too much time trying to match black socks.  Way too much time.  I spend way too much time folding the stupid socks.

Too Sensitive? Not Angry Enough?

Too Sensitive?

It was just a short remark.  Hardly noticed in the stream of flotsam that comes across on the News Feed.  But you made me feel stupid.  Was it necessary to add that clever put down?  It has soured my day.

I wonder if I do that some times.  Probably.  I will have to be more careful.  I don't need to defend my cleverness as much as I need to re-inforce my kindness.


Not Angry Enough?

In your personal message to me, you asked me something totally inappropriate.  I ignored it and went on chatting as if you had said nothing.  But your remark made me feel unclean.  Should I have called you out on it?  Should I have cut you off immediately?  I didn't.  Does that make me complicit?

Maybe I need to do something else today.

Dealing with Dragons, The Musical

This is the second song in my musical, based on Dealing with Dragons by Patricia C. Wrede.

Here are the lyrics:

Though I should stay, I long for adventure.

I am not ready to wed or to reign.

I long to go, to do things I’ve not done.

Head for the sunrise, my own goals to gain.

The way may be long, but still I can be strong.

Learn something new on the way.

I am not proper, but then proper’s a bore

There must be more that’s in store. 

Just starting out, away from the castle.

I am determined to find a new way.

Follow the path the frog said to start on.

Head for the hovel, knock three times [knock, knock, knock, snap fingers] 

Oh! Kay!

And here is the song:

Cimorene's Song

A New Direction

I turned 65 at my last birthday and I have finally come to terms with the fact that I will never have a successful career.  I have done a lot of different things successfully, don't get me wrong, but my career, as such, has been a haphazard shambles.

The biggest successes have been helping to found Countryside School, in order to meet the educational needs of my children - and numerous others.  The school is still doing well and I am happy about my contribution to its start.  I also am proud of the gifted program I ran for 5 years at Gifford School in Illinois.  Gifted education is no longer supported in Illinois and the gifted teacher/coordinator position was eliminated.  I chose to resign, rather than continue with a mishmash of part-time jobs, as teaching K-8 computer classes, 8th grade algebra, and 6th and 7th grade social studies was too much.  Other teachers may understand this: I had 31 different class preps per week, with NO repetition.  Plus I was responsible for all of the computer systems in the school (hardware and software) and the school's computer network.

I have found substitute teaching more interesting than I expected.  Even though it is discouraging to not be able to see much of a personal impact and it is even more discouraging to be paid so abysmally, I did enjoy visiting different schools and seeing different classrooms.  It is fascinating to me to compare schools (both physical layouts and staff), teachers, curricula, management styles, rules and expectations, and so forth.  There is a lot to think about as a sub.  Intellectually, the job is actually quite satisfying.

But, it is also very taxing.  One of my problems is my physical body.  I am arthritic and overweight and subbing is physically difficult - standing most of the day, bending over to help the younger ones, limited access to restrooms, cleaning up the classroom after the day is over.  Then, there is the emotional challenge.  Very few people seem to care that you are there.  Oh, they are glad that someone is there, they just don't care that it is ME (or grammatically, that that someone is I).  I feel more like a placeholder (Who are you today?) than a person.  At one school, I showed up for a job, but there was another person already there who had spoken with the teacher about it.  I could legally have insisted that the job was mine according to the rules of the district, but it was obvious that I was just an anonymous person and the other woman was REAL to them.  Unless you go regularly to one building only, that's what you are - an anonymous placeholder.

So, I am beginning to think of myself as retired.  I may still substitute teach, but I am more focused now on some other directions.  If you have been reading these occasional posts because you were interested in giftedness and/or education, this new direction may not be your cup of tea.  That is fine with me.

My current interest is in writing music.  It is another difficult field, but I am enjoying my beginning efforts.  So TTFN, as Tigger would say.

Money in Elections

The American election process has been bought.  By anyone who has money.  If you don't have money, your voice is worthless.  Your vote will still count, but unless you pony up money, the actual vote doesn't matter.  The jockeying for electoral position, the policy stances, the position statements are all decided well before the actual election.  Who gets to decide?  People with money.  Some candidates are beholden to a small number of people with a lot of money.  Other candidates rely on a larger number of people with more modest sums.  But no candidate caters to someone with only a vote and no money to back up that vote.

I care deeply about a number of issues.  I would love to contribute to causes that desperately need my money.  But I don't earn very much money as a substitute teacher - much less than it takes to live where I do.  My life style depends on my husband as the family earner.  Our history as a couple means that I don't feel bad about relying on him for basic support - food, shelter, clothing, and all those other necessities.  But it does mean that don't have my own money to contribute to causes I believe in.

Every time I sign a petition or write my representatives on behalf of causes I believe in, EVERY TIME, I am asked for money, money, and more money.  And the causes are always desperate.  Because, well, yes, this is actually a rather desperate time for some of the causes I believe in.  They aren't lying.  It is needed.  But I just can't contribute.  I don't have my own money.

So I feel shut out of the election process.  Without money, my voice doesn't mean much.  Why be interested in the outcomes, when even your side doesn't care - unless you have some spare cash to contribute?

I understand why some people just shut it out.  If you don't have money, you don't matter.  Why not just watch another celebrity's marriage fall apart or, here's an uplifting kitten video.  Have fun.

Explaining to a Skinny Person Just How Dieting Feels

Have you ever been REALLY, REALLY hungry?

Have you ever been REALLY, REALLY hungry for a whole day?

Now, imagine that you feel like that for a whole week.

Then, imagine how you would feel if you were told that you would have to feel that way for the rest of your life.

Then, imagine how you would feel if someone told you there was this great diet you could go on.  It works every time and you would NEVER feel hungry, again.  On this marvelous diet you can eat all of the cockroaches and eggplant you want.

Down Memory Lane 4 - Respecting Differences

A few years ago, I was flying from Dallas Fort-Worth to Denver.  On many such flights, people sitting inches from each other remain silent and just endure the crowded discomfort.  But, sometimes, you strike up a conversation with the person next to you - and it makes a lasting impression.  This was one such case.

I am not sure how the conversation got started.  Perhaps I was reading a children's book - something I do quite often.  At any rate, the younger woman sitting next to me and I got to talking.  She was a teacher; I had been a teacher and was currently a substitute teacher.  So we were discussing teaching and schools and school systems.  She was a devout Christian and taught in a private religious school; I am non-religious and have taught in private, public, and charter schools.  She was conservative politically; I am liberal-progressive.  In such situations, many topics are usually taboo.  We are, after all, in a situation where we will be together only briefly; why risk anger and accusations.  But we did anyway.  She was curious as to how people like me could support things like abortion.  She was interested in my reasons and actually respectful of them, even while disagreeing.  It turns out that she had gotten pregnant before marriage and had kept the baby (who had significant handicaps).  She couldn't imagine her life without him and couldn't imagine why anyone would get an abortion.  She believed in personhood beginning at conception.

My take on it is somewhat different from many liberal-progressives.  Yes, I believe that a woman should have control over her own body and her own health, which can be significantly impaired by pregnancy and childbirth.  But I also come at my views from an ecological perspective.  I believe that the current human population of the earth is well past the carrying capacity of our ecosystems.  We have altered the sustainability of many of those systems drastically, some beyond their capacity to recover.  [See articles about the Sixth Extinction, which some scientists believe is imminent.]  I think it is vital to our survival on earth that we do anything and everything we can to limit the population of humans on earth.

In addition, I believe that everyone should have the chance to live a life free from the devastating effects of hunger, lack of housing, lack of education, and lack of safety.  To live a life in such a manner requires a significant use of natural resources.  In other words, I would like to see it possible for anyone who works at it to live a life that was at least comfortably lower middle class, according to an American-style perspective.  With the world's current population, that level of consumption would exacerbate the current ecological problems.

One thing that I thought of later, that I have now added to my reasoning is that yes, she can't imagine life without her son.  But what about life without all of the other babies that she and her husband didn't have?  Most likely, since she and her husband had two children after they got married, they could have had more.  Do they miss the ones that they didn't have, due to birth control?  Do they miss the ones that she might have miscarried without even knowing it?  These potential children might have changed her life.  Does she miss them?  The answer is probably no.  Most women don't regret each and every menstrual cycle as a missed baby.

At any rate, it was a very respectful and interesting conversation.  I doubt if either of us changed our views much.  But it was encouraging to me to be able to have such a conversation.  I sometimes fear I am too opinionated to hear others out, but I think, in this case, both of us felt that we had been heard. So, I say, thank you to that anonymous woman.  Thank you for embodying the ability to disagree respectfully.

Are Introverts Worse at Friendship?

I had to teach a lesson that included a 25 question "Friendship Quiz" to third graders. The students were asked to rate themselves: 1 - Never, 2 - Sometimes, 3 - Most of the time, 4 - Always.  I must say, at the outset, that some of these statements seemed above the level of third graders, who are mostly 8 and 9 years old.  But some of them also made decidedly uncomfortable.  Remember, this quiz is titled "Friendship Quiz", so if you think of yourself as a good friend, you want to score pretty high.

Some of the statements that were to be rated:
I enjoy meeting new people.
I enjoy group activities.
I can carry on a conversation with someone I have just met.
I am able to find something I like in most people.

It seems to me that the quiz favors extroverts and that it would leave introverted students feeling as though their less gregarious characteristics mean that they aren't good friends.  There is a scale at the end of the quiz.
     75 - 100 points - You probably already have a lot of friends and are able to get along well with them most of the time.
     50 - 74 points - You have the potential to make friends, but you are probably having some problems  in some of your friendships.
     25 - 49 points - You have much room for improvement in your ability to make and keep friends.

And it was clear that some of the students NEEDED to rate themselves highly on everything.  One young lady gave herself straight 4s.

So, I have several questions about this lesson.  Is it appropriate for third graders?  Reading level: It seems to me that it was worded as though it was intended for older children or adults.  One of the statements was "I avoid criticizing friends."  Quite a few of the students did not understand the word 'criticizing'.  Emotional awareness: again, it seemed to me that some of the concepts might be unfamiliar emotionally to third graders.  How many third graders actually think about their ability to carry on conversations with strangers?  What about the kids who are told to not even talk to someone they don't know?

Then there was the one that was in specific conflict with something they had been told earlier in the year:  I am able to keep a secret.  Evidently, they had been explicitly told that "there are no secrets" at their school.

There were, as I said, 25 statements to this quiz and a number of them, including others not detailed here, made me a bit uncomfortable.  Not only would they make introverts feel as though they were bad friends, the level of introspection might make all the kids a bit anxious about their personalities and their reactions to normal events (meeting someone for the first time).

And a final question: given that the quiz made me uncomfortable and that I thought many of the questions were not worded in a helpful way, is there any way I could have gracefully gotten out of teaching the lesson?  I am a sub and this is a really nice school.  I enjoyed the day with the class.  I really don't want to alienate the teacher.  But I also don't like some of the messages the lesson has.  What should I have done?  What could I have done differently?

Debunking the 10,000 Hour Rule; Embracing the Joy of Doing

When my older daughter was young, she took gymnastics classes. She was good enough that she joined her local gymnastics team. She was good enough to compete at ranked levels. But I questioned whether it was even worthwhile for her to participate, because I knew, from her physique, that she was probably never going to be good enough to be competitive at a national level. Why put in all those hours if it would never be enough? Why?
Because she loved it.  And now that she is grown up, she still does.  She even coaches gymnastics in her "spare" time - while she is working on a Ph.D. in biology. 
I STARTED writing music at the ripe old age of 59.  I am enjoying it tremendously.  Will I ever reach "genius-level" excellence?  No.  Does that mean I should stop even trying?  
I agree that the 10,000 hour rule is a myth.  But I also think that it is time to validate reaching non-genius level excellence. There is a lot of enjoyment to be had from the pursuit of something you are drawn to.  It is great if other people like what you have done and I won't deny that I would love to have my musical entertain an actual audience.  But genius-level excellence is rare and if you don't have a huge amount of time or a huge amount of natural talent, you can still have a huge amount of fun.   

Writing Sentences

I was teaching a literacy lesson today for third graders.  There was a reading selection and then 3 pages of worksheets about the lesson.  I went over the directions for each section of the worksheet, slowly and carefully.  I emphasized that the students were to write their answers in COMPLETE sentences.  I reviewed what a complete sentence was: it begins with a capital letter; it ends with punctuation, and it expresses a complete idea.  I gave and elicited examples of complete sentences and sentence fragments.  Then I let the students work.  They worked very well and were completely focused on their work.

When they finished, they were to bring their work up to me to review, before turning it in.  AT LEAST two-thirds of them had failed to write complete sentences.  WHY??? Did they not understand  the directions? No, they understood the directions. Did they think that their sentence fragments were sentences?  No, they realized that they were not complete sentences.  WHY didn't they do the assignment correctly?  Blank looks.  So, I sent them back to re-do it.  And re-do it.  And re-do it.  Some of them took three or four tries before they were even close.

Oh, and these were gifted students.  I really don't understand why this is so often the case - and it is.  Not just in schools for gifted students, but for kids in a lot of elementary school classrooms.  They learn to spell a word for spelling instruction, but they spell it wrong in writing class.  They learn correct grammar on worksheets, but fail to use it in an essay.  They know how to write complete sentences and they know they are required, but they don't write them.

I am still puzzling out WHY???

Dividing by Decimals

I taught a math lesson today where the premise was that the cost of making a cat's eye marble was $0.312.  The idea was that the students were supposed to figure out how many dimes that was (3.12), how many pennies that was (31.2), and how many tenths of pennies (312) - only this made absolutely NO SENSE to the students.  One student insisted (correctly) that it would take 4 dimes to pay for the cost of that marble and he absolutely could NOT understand the idea of cost using a fraction of a dime.  I thought maybe the money comparison, especially when taken to the thousandths place might be the problem, so I tried explaining the concept using distance instead.  Some of the students were able to understand the problem, once the units were changed, but a lot of them were so confused by the money example that they just gave up.

I have never taught this lesson from this particular book before.  Is this a standard way of explaining division by decimals?  I don't recall having so much difficulty with other textbooks.  Is this part of Common Core?

I probably won't be back in that class tomorrow, but if I were, is there a way to help them understand it, now that they are already confused?

Substitute Teaching or Working at Walmart?

With Walmart workers now making $10 an hour, will school districts need to raise substitute teachers' pay? 

Walmart: $10/hour * 8 hours/day = $80/day.
Sub pay: $95/day with no benefits and no guarantee of work and a maximum of 180 working days.

Advantages of working at Walmart:

1) steady work

2) regular workplace

3) some benefits

Disadvantages of working at Walmart:

1) physically difficult - on feet most of the day

2) not especially intellectually challenging

3) benefits are still minimal

Advantages of working as a Substitute Teacher:

1) interesting work

2) can choose to take days off

3) variety

Disadvantages of working as a Substitute Teacher:

1) anonymity - "Who are you today?"

2) no benefits

3) even if you work every single day, there is no way to earn even poverty level wages.  
$100/day * (max) 180 days/school year = (max) $18,000 per school year.  And just try finding a part time job for the days when there is no school.  

Disclaimer:  I am sure there are many more things to say about each job.  Many more.  

Cinderella, the Musical and Fat Shaming

This is a review of the musical as it was performed in Denver at the Denver Center for the Performing Arts.

I went to the matinee performance, so there were many little girls dressed up and getting their pictures taken by the wall poster of the stairway.  It was one of the highlights of the event for me.

The audience was, as might be expected, largely female.  I was sitting in a row that, except for a couple of men, was all women and girls.  In front of me, were six college age women, who seem to have come together.

The "book", as they call the play's script, has been changed some for this version of the Rogers and Hammerstein work.  There was a male protester, who was demanding better treatment of the poor people in the kingdom.  And the role of the advisor to the prince was to shield him from the fact that the plight of the poor was partly due to using the funds for the court.  The prince became a rather lost young man in search of a sense of self.  The fairy godmother was a vagrant, witchy woman - until she was transformed into an Oprah look-alike.

The plot also added the transformation of one of the sisters into a best friend of Cinderella's, when she decides to run off with the protester - reminiscent of both Wicked and Frozen.  It is the best girl friends model of musicals.

And the final meeting of Cinderella with the prince is the meeting of the protester, with his group of poor people, talking to the prince and the prince now finding his purpose in life - to make the plight of the poor easier and, incidentally, to also marry Cinderella.

All of these changes could have worked for me, had I not been expecting the original Rogers and Hammerstein work.  And they probably worked just fine for the audience that was substantially younger, for the most part, than I am.

But one thing has been bugging me and it is enough to jade my feelings about the musical in general. The other step-sister, the one who doesn't run off with the protester, is made up to be hideous.  She is fat and is dressed more gaudily than anyone else.  She is a perfect example of fat shaming.  Of all of the characters in the musical, she is the one who is made fun of, who is held up for laughs.  Two of the male characters are also hefty - but their weight doesn't mean they are held up for ridicule.

Just as a mind exercise, I have been imagining what would have changed, had the fat step-sister been the one who befriended Cinderella and who ran off with the protester.  It doesn't quite work.  It isn't funny enough.

And there we have it.  Making fun of fat people is funny.  We (and yes, I am one of them) are open game for laughs.

Down Memory Lane - 3

When I was 16, I went over to Germany as a foreign student with the Youth for Understanding program.  It was a wonderful year, which I may write more about over time, but one of the reasons it was so valuable was that it gave me greater perspective on the influence of culture.  In Iowa, I was part of a conservative, relatively religious family.  I went to church on Sundays, sang in the church choir, attended Sunday school, and even joined the church youth group.  My parents and grandparents voted Republican and were supporters of conservative government.  I remember going to a parade to honor Barry Goldwater.

But this was an era of change: Vietnamese War, civil rights, women's rights.  And as a teen growing up in that changing time, I was bound to change, too.  One of the interesting changes became apparent to me through song.  In the US, just before I left for Germany, The Ballad of the Green Beret was popular.

Ballad of the Green Beret by Barry Sadler

Fighting soldiers from the sky
Fearless men who jump and die
Men who mean just what they say
The brave men of the Green Beret

Silver wings upon their chest
These are men, America's best
One hundred men we'll test today
But only three win the Green Beret

Trained to live, off nature's land
Trained in combat, hand to hand
Men who fight by night and day
Courage deep, from the Green Beret

Silver wings upon their chest
These are men, America's best
One hundred men we'll test today
But only three win the Green Beret

Back at home a young wife waits
Her Green Beret has met his fate
He has died for those oppressed
Leaving her this last request

Put silver wings on my son's chest
Make him one of America's best
He'll be a man they'll test one day
Have him win the Green Beret

When I got over to Germany, I found that this tune was also popular. It was a while before I was able to realize, though that, far from being a pro-War song, in German, this song was very much ANTI-War.  The war at the time was the war in Viet Nam.  These are the German words.

Irgendwo in Fremden Land

1. Irgendwo in fremden Land

Ziehen wir durch Stein und Sand.

Fern von zu Haus und vogelfrei

Hundert Mann, und ich bin dabei.

2. Ein hundert Mann und ein Befehl

Und ein Weg, den keiner will.

Tag ein Tag aus wer weiß wohin

Verbranntes Land und was ist der Sinn?

3. Ganz allein in dunkler Nacht

Hab ich oft daran gedacht,

Daß weit von hier der Vollmond scheint

Und weit von mir ein Mädchen weint.

4. Und die Welt ist doch so schön,

Könnt ich Dich noch einmal sehn.

Nun trennt uns schon ein langes Jahr,

Weil ein Befehl unser Schicksal war.

5. Wahllos schlägt das Schicksal zu

Heute ich und morgen Du.

Ich hör von fern die Krähen schreien

Im Morgenrot. Warum muß das sein.

This roughly translates to:

Somewhere in Foreign Land

1. Somewhere in a foreign land
We pull ourselves through stone and sand.
Far from home and free for the vultures to pick us over
One hundred men, and I am with them.

2. One hundred men and one command
And a way that no one wants
Day in day out, who know where to
Burned up land and for what reason?

3. Completely alone in the dark of night
I've often thought
That far from here the full moon shines
And far from here a young girl cries.

4.  And yet the world is still so beautiful
If I could just see you once again
Now we are separated for a whole year
Because one command made our fate

5. Randomly fate strikes us 
Today on me; tomorrow on you.
I hear far away the crows shriek
In the red of dawn. Why must this be?

Once I understood the differences between these two interpretations of the song (same melody, different words), it made a profound difference in my thinking.  Intelligent, well-informed people could have diametrically different views on important subjects.  Another culture could completely reject some views that I held without questioning.  

It was a life altering realization for me and one of the reasons I think that travel is so important.  

Personal Connections to Learning; Ten Obvious Truths about Educating Kids that Keep Getting Ignored

Re:  Ten Obvious Truths about Educating Kids that Keep Getting Ignored

The above article touches on a lot of what I have to say, but I want to consolidate my own thoughts about what we know, but ignore.

Engaging interest; telling our personal stories.

There is a huge time crunch in schools these days.  As a teacher, you are supposed to get through the given reading lesson, for several different reading groups.  You are supposed to teach mini-lessons on writing to a given writing prompt and there all all those other literacy things that you are supposed to teach, too.  You have a (largely scripted) math lesson that needs to be taught.  You have to fit in those social studies and science lessons somewhere.  And then there are silent reading and read-aloud times that you know are so beneficial.  There isn't really time to get the students really interested in the subject matters and most of all there is no time to pursue things that the students really ARE interested in.

Say you are supposed to be teaching a lesson about longitude and latitude.  How many lessons actually start with kids holding a plain ball (an orange, a pummelo?, a rubber playground ball) decorated with random dots?  How do you get kids to actually wonder why we need longitude and latitude?  How could you get kids to describe exactly which dot was indicated?  Put random continents on the ball.  What directs would you give to get from one dot to another?

Who has time for this?

Instead, you have the kids read the two pages on longitude and latitude and then do a worksheet trying to find Chicago (which half of them think is a state or a country) or find the object that is at 40 degrees North and 105 degrees West.  Which they also don't care about - unless they live there, and then it is mildly interesting, but quickly forgotten.

When I am subbing, I generally carry a picture book to read to the kids, if there is an awkward time when something is cancelled, a lesson is too short, kids need to settle down from recess, or whatever. One of the books that has been very effective for me is Diary of a Wombat by Jackie French.  Part of the reason this book is so effective is that I take the time to talk about going to Australia, going to a couple of zoos and seeing wombats in real life.  I physically show them about how big wombats are and tell them that the ones I saw were rather stinky, but still adorable.  Then I tell them about the author of the book, who actually had a wombat living under her house.  All of these stories are personal things that interest me.  And since they interest me, I am able to get the students interested in them.  And even though the kids don't really know me, personal stories connect them to the book.  If there is time, we can also talk about their personal encounters with interesting animals.

The key word in the previous sentence is "time".  Too often, there just isn't time.  How many times have kids been assigned the ubiquitous "Do a report on your favorite animal" project?  How much time does the teacher take to help the students decide what it is about the animal that they find interesting?  Usually, what I see is a list of things the kids are supposed to find out about "their" animal (habitat, range, life cycle, etc.).  And a stack/shelf/cart of books.  And Kid X can't do their project on Animal A, because that animal was already taken by Kid Y, so they will have to do Animal B.

Perhaps most teachers do take the time to develop the interest in these projects before they set the kids loose on them.  As a sub, I am only there for a short time - usually just one day - so I probably, yeah UNDOUBTEDLY, miss most of what the teacher has done.  But I also know that kids generally seem detached from these sorts of assignments.  They aren't really following up their interests.  Gory shark attacks aren't generally allowed to be discussed in their slide show, but it is really what interests them about sharks.  There isn't time for that.

We need more time and more personal connections.

Poll: Have You Ever?

It occurred to me this morning, not for the first time, but rather strongly, that many of the students I sub for have very different childhood experiences from what I had.  That isn't necessarily bad, but it needs to be taken into consideration when we teach them.  So here are some questions that stem from my childhood.

1) Have you ever climbed a tree and sat in the branches a few minutes?

2) Have you ever played in a creek and made a dam across it?

3) Have you ever made a tunnel in snow?

4) Have you ever raised a farm animal for food?

5) Have you ever helped preserve food from your family's own garden for the winter?

6) Have you ever known everyone who lives on your street?

7) Have you ever blown the seeds off of puffy dandelions?

8) Have you ever sat on a teeter totter?

9) Have you ever camped outside with no tent?

10) Have you ever spent most of the day outside without parent supervision?

Note: I am not saying these things are all necessary or worthwhile experiences - just different.  My own children would probably answer no to most of these questions.  Very different lives.

Hair Cut

I got my hair cut yesterday and this time, I went back to the inexpensive quick cut store that I had gone to back in August.  When I had been there in August, I knew that they had written down the information about my hair cut and I thought it would be easy now for them to just repeat the same hair cut.

I swim four times a week and, because my hair has just enough wave/curl to it that it manages to dry rather bizarrely, I generally blow dry it at the gym.  I tried growing it really long, so I could just let it dry by itself, but, at my age, long hair looks rather scraggly, so in August, I had had the long hair cut off.  Seven inches of it. 

[Did my husband notice?  No, but that is a topic for a different post.] 

At any rate, I had liked the August cut.  Long enough that I can tuck it behind my ears to get it out of my face, but short enough to turn under in the back.  So, I told the woman cutting my hair that I wanted the same cut that I got in August.  Imagine my surprise, though, when she said that the note about the hair cut in August said "cut 7 inches".  At this point, cutting off seven inches wasn't possible in most places and in others would have left VERY short hair.  Not exactly an appealing hair style - even for one as style-challenged as I am. 

So the question is, why would any hairdresser write "cut 7 inches" as the description for a hair cut?  How is that a helpful annotation?  Don't they usually write the target end product, e.g., ear-length bob?  At any rate, the hairdresser managed to figure out what I wanted and the hair cut is fine. 

I hope she wrote a better annotation than the previous person.  This hair cut cost $17 for me, since I am now a senior citizen.  The salon I went to a couple of years ago cost $85.  My needs are simple - I will stick with the inexpensive hair cut, even if I have to describe it for them each time. 

Women's Pajamas

OK, I know this isn't a normal topic for this blog, but I am thinking about it, so this is where it is going.

And, before I get too far started in this post, I want to mention that I am not talking about nightgowns.  I don't care for them, as they always end up twisted in a doughnut around my waist.  I am talking about pajamas, with some sort of top and some sort of pant-like bottom.

When I look for pajamas in catalogs or in stores, they NEVER have what I am looking for and I can't quite figure out why not.  In the summer, they show spaghetti strap tops with shorts; in the spring and fall, they show spaghetti strap tops or short sleeved tops with long pants; in the winter, it is long sleeve tops with long pants.  What I never see is long sleeved tops with shorts - and I am not sure why, because that is exactly what I want.   

There have been times - when our house wasn't air-conditioned, when I was grateful for spaghetti strap tops, but most of the time, I REALLY want my arms covered.  They are the part of me that is most likely to lose covering when I am sleeping.  My legs almost never stray from under the covers.  I have different bed coverings for the season, but I choose them so that they are the right weight for me, when I am under them.  This means, I don't need long pants in the winter.  Like nightgowns, long pants tend to wind up twisted in a doughnut - only this time around my knees.  The comforter keeps me nice and toasty and long pants also end up being too warm. 

But I need my shoulders and arms covered, for when the bed coverings slip down or I roll over.  How do women in spaghetti strap tops keep their arms warm? 

Years ago, my older sister mentioned to me that she bought men's boxer shorts for sleeping in.  I thought at the time that that was rather strange, but I now do exactly that.  I get men's boxer shorts, preferably knit, and a loose long-sleeved top.  I have found women's sleep sets where you can buy just the shorts, but the shorts are too skimpy - designed to be sexually enticing and not comfortable and durable. This is a solution, but I sometimes wish, just for my own perfectionism, that the two parts matched and were pretty. 

Why Class Lists Are So Important and Why My Ranting about Them Is Now Validated

I had an "exciting" half day today.  It started out routine.  I got there at 11:00 and the teacher went through the day with me and the kids.  They don’t eat lunch there until 12:45, so they still had a long time before lunch.  They spent it working on two different things on the laptop computers and were actually quite well behaved.  Then, just as I had taken most of them out to recess (the one before their lunch) and I was near the front entrance, watching the stragglers, the fire alarm went off.  This was a real fire and not just a drill.

Fortunately, there was one girl from my class still nearby and I got her to tell me where we were supposed to go.  Also, fortunately, I had both my clipboards with me - the one with the day’s schedule and the one with the class list.  There wasn’t time to go back to the classroom for the emergency folder, so we just headed out the door.  At first the kids on the playground had no idea what was happening, so it took a long time to gather them up - and even so, it seemed that we might be in the wrong place, because we were randomly next to some second graders.  (My class was 5th grade.)  As soon as a lot of them found our group, I started calling the roll and telling the kids whose names I read to sit down.  Even so, I was missing 6 kids.  One teacher whose kids were all there handed me the emergency red card that is supposed to signal that you are missing some students in the class.  I had had no time to go back to the classroom to get the emergency folder, so I had no signalling card.

Then the second grade teacher started yelling at my class, because they weren’t in a straight line.  I was so busy trying to check to see which kids were missing that I hadn’t had time to make sure they were in a straight line.  Sigh.  (Note: she didn’t yell at the next class over, which was another 5th grade.  They were worse than my class, but their teacher, also a sub, didn’t get the behavior lecture.)

Then, since I was holding up the red card, the assistant principal (?) came over and wanted to know which kids were missing.  I showed her the list.  She point out two of the kids in the special ed group.  I hadn’t met them in the morning, so I had no idea who they were.  She told me another student was absent (the regular teacher had, of course, taken morning attendance, but I had no idea).  Finally, they called over the walkie-talkie and said that they had found 3 more of my students with another teacher.  So they were all accounted for.  Whew!

It turned out that there was a fire in one of the microwaves in the lunch room.  It was significant enough to cause some smoke and set off the automatic fire alarms, but there was no real damage.  Lunch and recess were shifted to be about 20 minutes later than usual.  On the way back in, I remarked to the assistant principal that it was sure good that I had the class list with me.  I then got another lecture about how I should ALWAYS have an extra class list.  I have REGULARLY complained on this blog about not getting class lists at every school I go to if they don’t give them to me, so I was a bit resentful about being lectured about class lists.  Sigh.

But then, after I had calmed down from being lectured twice, I realized that this experience actually validates what I have been saying about class lists.  SUBS MUST HAVE ONES THEY CAN TAKE WITH THEM FOR EVERY CLASS.  This means that, not only can I legitimately insist on getting a second copy if it is required that I sign the original and send it to the office for attendance purposes, but I can also insist on copies of class lists if teachers "switch" kids for math or literacy classes (or any other classes for that matter).  This may not make the school secretaries terribly happy, but I understand why I MUST.

This was not a serious emergency, but you never know when one will occur.  It is better to be prepared.

How to Keep Going, or Not Complete Chaos

I took a job at a school that isn't a huge drive from me.  I got there in plenty of time - early, in fact.  The person who normally checks subs in wasn't there, but the woman who helped me knew how to check me in.  But she was confused when I told her the name of the teacher I was subbing for.  I didn't get the name quite right, but I knew she taught 4th grade.  Only the teacher, whose name I recalled no longer taught 4th grade, which is what the sub caller had said she taught.  This year, she teaches 2nd grade.  Only I don't normally teach 2nd grade.  Sigh.  I will do it today.

She gave me a sub tag (no key) and showed me on the map of the school, where the room was.  Only the door to the "pod" was locked.  I had to walk around to another entrance (one she had told me to avoid) to get to the room.  Only the room was locked.  Back to the office to get someone to open the doors.

I might mention that my back has been really hurting me.  I took Friday off, because I was afraid that I couldn't stand for even part of the day.  Standing and walking cause me the most pain.

Back to the room.  She unlocks the door.  A neighboring teacher comes in about 5 minutes later.  I have found the teacher's desk, but no lesson plans.  The other teacher finds the emergency folder and the sub folder.  She says she will check for lesson plans.  On the desk is a note saying that the teacher I am subbing for has morning outdoor duty.  I still have time to look for the safety vest for outdoor duty and to look through the emergency folder and the sub folder.  Yay!  A class list!  Two kids have severe nut allergies and epi-pens are available - where?  I have no idea.  There is nothing in the emergency folder.  There is no emergency bag by the door.  Assumption: epi-pens must be in the nurse's office. [Questions:  where is the nurse's office?  where did I put the map of the school?]

The other teacher has not come back with lesson plans.  It is time to go outside for morning duty.  Put on vest; head out the door.  Teacher comes to me on the way out with lesson plans.  Yay!  Grab lesson plans and head outside.  There is another teacher there who tells me what to do.  Help keep the drop-off line moving: pull forward; drop kid(s) off quickly; watch for other cars exiting.  No time to look at lesson plans.  Finally morning duty is over.  I can't get in the door, because my tag doesn't open that door.  Have to walk around.  (Back hurts.)

Special education teacher comes by.  She has other assignment for today, so she can't take the kid she normally takes for special classes.  She will tell him.  

By the time I get back to the classroom and talk to special ed teacher, it is time to get the kids to come inside.  Fortunately, it looks like there is some "morning work" on their tables.  Maybe I will have a minute to look at the lesson plans.  The first instruction says to copy some emergency lesson pages in the sub folder.  Only, it is too late to go to the copier, because the kids are already there.  The sub plans list a block of time but I can't tell what the students are supposed to do during this time.  I look on the board.  There is a schedule, but it doesn't quite match the times on the sub plans.  Wing it.  "Spelling" is on the board.  There is a folder with spelling words for each kid.  No idea what to do with them.  Ask the kids.  They need special paper to copy the words.  Search room for special paper.  One kid finds it.  Students start copying their words.  Some finish quickly.  What do they do now?  They supposedly need a different kind of paper to practice writing the words.  Can't find the other kind of paper.  Wing it: just quiz each other on your words.

After spelling is over, I call them to the rug to talk a bit.  We have time before the next thing on the schedule, so I read a book that I brought:  Diary of a Wombat.  Kids enjoy it.  Parent come in while I am reading.  She is supposed to help.  I ask her to copy the pages I need for the rest of the day.  She comes back later with one page done.  The copier has broken.  She leaves while I am reading.

I still can't decipher lesson plans.  Check the board again.  Reading.  Kids say Daily 5.  OK, we will try Daily 5.  Only it is too long for one session of Daily 5 and not long enough for 2 sessions.  So, one session and a bit of extra time for snack.  Then recess.  Ah, time to see if I can get the pages for the rest of the day copied.  Send kids outside.  Big copier is still broken.  Small one works, but is out of paper in the default bin.  Can't see any paper to refill it.  Decide to use second tray of paper.  Wrong orientation - try again.  It won't feed from the top.  Try again.  It won't double side.  Sigh.  Decide to waste paper - only 5 minutes of recess left and I still don't have the math papers copied.

Back to the room.  Get kids.  Another round of Daily 5.  Too early for math.  Third round of Daily 5.  Parent comes to help with math.  Middle school student comes to help.  High school student comes to help.  I am trying to figure out what to do for the lesson and what to do with all of the helpers.

Math time.  I haven't had time to look at the worksheets, but they look fairly standard.  Start to teach the first one.  It is good, but takes different kids different amounts of time.  A bit chaotic.  I teach the next two.  They are completely bizarre.  Kids don't really get them - neither do I - they are poorly done.  Not sure if they are the correct level for these kids. Go with it anyway.  Kids who finish early can do math games.  Which ones?  I have no idea.  Which games do you usually play?  They don't know.  Sigh.  They find flash cards.  Sounds good to me.  It is now almost 12:45.  Time for lunch and recess.  Finally.  No wonder snack is important to them.

Find teachers' restroom.  Teacher is standing in front of door, so I can't get by.  She is talking to another teacher.  She sees me; she doesn't move.  They finish; she goes into restroom first.  Sigh.

Back to classroom for lunch.  Read lesson plans for afternoon.  Still using plans from the emergency sub folder.  Back to copier for more worksheets for afternoon.  Grade a few math papers.  Time to go get kids.  Only, they aren't where I expected them.  Back to classroom.  Kids already there; they came in another door.  Another read-aloud.  Take kids to PE.  Whoops, I forgot to take afternoon attendance.  I think everyone is still here.  Tell office verbally.  One girl is leaving early for dentist's appointment.  Long walk back to classroom.  (Back still hurting.)

Look over emergency worksheets.  They seem do-able.  Go back to other end of school to get kids from PE.  (Back hurting.) Teach Venn diagrams related to one read-aloud.  They do another one on their own.  Almost time to go home.  Yay!  I may make it.

Clean up, stack chairs.  Send kids out the door.

Whoops, I almost forgot - I have afternoon outside duty, too.  Go out, direct traffic again.  Doors are locked.  I have to go in the front door again.

Back to classroom to write up the day.

Sigh.  I lived.

P.S.  If you think this is the whole day, you are sorely mistaken.  I left out the squabbles, the pencil problems, the sitting next to me problems, the ice pack for a bumped head, the special ed teachers who took random kids at random times, kids telling me that I was doing something wrong, no logins for the computers, the kid who insisted on a reward ticket for doing something nice, the inability to get the projector and overhead focused, the asking me about my Halloween costume (and retrieving my Medusa hat from my car to show the kids), etc., etc.

And, there was the boy who came up to me at the beginning of the day.  He introduced himself and asked me my name.  Then he said he was a little nervous about me, because he didn't know me.  But he did give me a hug, anyway.

See, it wasn't all bad.

All for $94.50 before taxes.